The Engagement | Rivers and Roads

6.20.2019

The Engagement




I remember the first time Shane asked me about the engagement season and how long I thought it should be. I said between three and six months -- he heartily agreed. When we eventually got engaged and set our wedding date we had exactly four months to plan. We both think it could have been three and we would've been just fine.

Now I know everyone is different and timelines vary from couple to couple because of life in general, but when it came to being engaged, Shane and I were of the mindset that we wouldn’t get engaged unless we were ready to get married. Hence, the short timeframe.

Our engagement season, as short as it was, seemed to last FOREVER. Your best friend asked you to marry him and you said yes and now you have to wait even longer to be together forever. The agony.😉

Not only were we planning a wedding, but we were looking for a house at the same time. We each also moved two times while we were engaged before we finally ended up in the same home after we got married. Thankfully we had great friends who gave us each places to live leading up to our wedding. But to say things were stressful is an understatement. I had never ugly cried so many times in front of Shane as I did while we were engaged.

I had a couple of people tell me to soak up the season because I would never get it back. While I can honestly say I don't miss it at all, I can tell you there are a few things we did while we were engaged that I'm very thankful for.

We made time for prayer. You guys, satan would like nothing more than to tear apart something that wants to bring glory to Jesus. And we definitely felt that at times during our engagement, and I know we'll feel that at times in our marriage. So prayer was and is a must. We prayed with each other and for each other and it made all the difference. It was a great way to encourage and remind ourselves that we were a team and that Jesus was with us.

We made time to prepare. Maybe I'll talk about this more at some point, but Shane and I did the lion's share of our marriage prep before we got engaged. We asked some wise friends to mentor us and went through a program called Prepare + Enrich, which you can complete while you're dating, engaged, and even after marriage. It was really important to me to start this process before we got engaged because I'm such a preparer. On top of that, I was also going to individual counseling, which was enormously helpful to have someone with an objective point of view offering Godly wisdom as Shane and I planned for marriage!

We made time to play. Remembering to have fun in the midst of a really stressful season is so important! In between all of my cry fests, we remembered to laugh. Mostly because Shane is really good at making me laugh and I think he's ridiculously funny. We planned and dreamed about our future together, which is super fun when you know your future begins so soon. We went on dates -- lots of times that looked like running errands and eating dinner at Costco, but hey, it was time together, and I will always treasure that.

So there ya go. A little peek into the crazy stressful and wonderful whirlwind of the season called engagement.